Children don't want perfect parents.
They want real!
A statement we often use with our son is, "Doing right is more important than being right."
Pride is never competition.
It is important to establish a set of values in your home and not just wing it. Once you know your flight plan, there are specific steps that will equip you for the turbulence and provide you with a safe landing. The goal is to achieve poise under pressure and not tailspin when the demands of life come your way.
Teach your children and encourage them. Be passionate about getting it right. Be prepared to invest your best. They rarely land on their own. Children are learning and growing all the time. They desperately need to see us learning and growing as well. Be a wise role model and be real.
Make your life worth modeling.
It is easy to be nice when things run smoothly. However, when the pressure is on our behavior often grows ugly.
Pressure is compounded by disorder. If your environment is in order, you have the freedom to focus on the problem rather than be overwhelmed and then overreact. Learn to appreciate the uniqueness of each family member. As you refine order in your life, you will enjoy uncovering solutions that are quick and simple to use when under pressure.
Planning for Pressure
- Prepare your clothes the night before, including accessories and extras.
- Special events need to go on your schedule and keep a copy in sight.
- To prepare for particular events allow at least a 15-minute window of time in addition to your morning routine.
- Refresh your mind with wisdom each day. I suggest reading the Bible.
- Do not panic under pressure. Be organized. When you have order then you are able to help others with grace and ease.
- Watch your tone of voice. Keep frustration to yourself. If you cannot control the events of your morning, then control the tone of your voice. It matters!
- Be realistic. We are all a work in progress and you are God's choice for parenting your child.
Proverbs 14:1 tells us that “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.”
We have a responsibility to build our family by helping and encouraging them in every way possible through our words. How do we do this?
Doorways to Development
- Reflect kindness through your words and actions.
- Seal your lips before the word slips.
- Chaos is not the time to vent frustration. Communicate when you are calm. The dinner table is a good place for dialogue and decisions.
- Show empathy. Defer pride. Rather, stand in their shoes.
- Stay calm and collected.
- Create a solution quickly.
- Ensure that each family member feels a valuable part of his or her team.
- Work toward a common goal.
- Display a pleasant attitude.
- Do not continually express inconvenience. This is unproductive behavior.
- Pool your resources and get the job done.
- Administrate. Have a place for every object and have everything in its place
- Children are in training. Lower your expectations and be an encourager.
- Make it easy for them to learn.
We grow what we sow and our children reflect our values.
Incivility, impoliteness, and disrespect need weeding out of the home. When we neglect to cultivate manners, then we can expect bad behavior in future generations.
Sow the seeds of security into children’s lives by teaching them how to cope under pressure. If we do not demonstrate these principles in our own lives each day, they will soon grow up and see the chaff. We damage our example when we do not reflect respect for each other in our homes.
When the pitfalls come, the same principles that drive success will also drive a resolve to face the challenges.
"It is a great honor to be an Etiquette and Protocol Professional. It is a greater honor to be a wife, a mother, and a friend. The stadium of home produces the showground of success." Copyright © - Deborah Choma
Until next time, I encourage you with this - Be responsible and lead responsibly.